I know that it is only the beginning but we/I have had 4 people tell us how awful we are to take in an older child into our home. Keep in mind that only one of these people have already done it and it went horribly bad. No my family story so I will not share in on my blog.
I have already been defending international adoption for some time but it is so much more personal to me now. This is NOT a spur of the moment decision, we have been talking about this for awhile now. If you really want to know the details, years have been spent going over this. I get it. I really do. But when out find out someone is pregnant do you immediately tell them stories about how awful infants are, how they will ruin your life, how this is the worst thing that can ever happen?!?
On a better note. Our dear friends found out that they will be adopting baby #2 any day now!! We cannot wait to meet the new little guy!!
8 comments:
Andrea, follow your heart !!! That is what you must do! Only you will know in your heart what is right for your family, if it does turn out bad, then thats what you and YOUR family deal with and if it turns out to be one of the best things you ahve ever done then thats something YOU and YOUR famiy can celebrate. May you bask in the sunshine watching your family grow.
If only people could offer support and keep negative opinions to themselves. Sometimes we feel the need to "pooh" upon ideas that we don't understand or aren't necessarily our own, but does that make them wrong?? You know you can make anything work-don't worry about what anyone else thinks, they most likely won't be living with you will they??
For some reason people think they should add their two cents whether you ask or not and whether they have experience or not. Even then, their experiences are not your experiences. Each child is different so take everything with a grain of salt. There could be a child out there praying for a family and not realizing how God is going to answer their prayers in a marvelous way when they meet you!
I have always thought you are a little nutty, but that is why I love you. You follow your heart and do what you know is right, regardless of others.
Like I said on fb, it's an impressive thing that you're doing. And anyone who doesn't think so needs to have a serious attitude change. It makes me mad. I'm right with you along the lines of telling someone how horrible an infant is if they tell you they're pregnant - Aiden was an unplanned pregnancy and when we announced it to the friends we were sharing a house with at the time, the very first reaction I got was not a "congratulations" or "we're so happy for you", it was "So you're having an abortion, right?". Would I share my news with a smile on my face if I wasn't happy about it? So same with you - this is a joyful thing in your life. You're sharing the news because it's something that you WANT, something that's important to you. I don't know if it's something you can do, but I would consider telling these people, "I'm sorry you seem to be uncomfortable with our decision to provide a safe, loving home to a child who doesn't have one. You're welcome to come see us when you are more at ease with the idea".
Of anyone I know, you can do this. You have a heart that can love unconditionally. You have the knowledge to know what you are getting into, and how to do it right.
I love you and will be with you every step of the way. Oh muffin, your baby girl is thinking and dreaming of you right now. Feel her dreams, feel her heart. Pray for the transition.
Thanks gals. Tarah, you comment has me in tears. Seriously only you can do that!! Love you all!!! XOXO
Older child adoption is HARD work...and if you are ready to put the time and effort into it-GO FOR IT! I just wish more people were told before hand what all might be needed, so they coudl eb prepared for their child.
People outside of international adoption have a hard time understanding that I truly have 3 3 year olds...Isabella-a true 3 year old and Morgan Yisak and parker Yared (8ish and 10ish) but socially, emotionally barely 3 year olds...
As you know -I call it all worth it!
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